Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I have fence marks all over my body
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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