This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
