As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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