I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I need help removing her.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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