It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
