i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
this hospital has no fireball
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize
