You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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