do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
