Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
