hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
