did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Blood and glitter go together right?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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