Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize