I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
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