She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
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