sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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