do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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