party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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