he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
