Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
