I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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