She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize