They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
