I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Can you repeat that, but with context?
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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