I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize