He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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