Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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