Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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