NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
