Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
you inspire me to be a worse person
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Randomize
