So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
