Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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