Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
there is puke in my bra ... again
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