I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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