do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
