I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
