ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
My vagina is very pro this idea
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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