Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra

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(404): View more from Georgia

think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...

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(516): View more from New York

Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you

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(217): View more from Illinois

Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?

(1-217): View more from Illinois

Vomiting outside the employee entrance

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(226): View more from Ontario

This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex

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(301): View more from Maryland

Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?

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(631): View more from New York

Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.

(508): View more from Massachusetts

I believe they call that patchouli.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.

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(309): View more from Illinois

Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.

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