Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
