I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
