He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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