There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
