ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
she peed on how many people?
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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