So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
