And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
