why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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