This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
