Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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