hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
