do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize