you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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